Just because you are dealing with divorce, it doesn’t mean you have to dread the holidays. No matter how dreary the holiday season may feel, it is possible to catch a glimpse of hope and joy. Here are a few tips to keep in mind whether you are in the middle of a split or it’s the first year(s) after your divorce.
Be kind to yourself
Having compassion for yourself is key, especially during the holidays. It is a hectic time and it will require patience since you will be working on a new “normal”. If you can’t be kind to yourself and take a deep breath and go with the flow, then you won’t have much compassion for others around you as they are adjusting to the divorce as well. A little kindness and patience will go a long way and may lead to a more enjoyable holiday than you think.
Have an open mind
This means it’s important to be flexible about the festivities. Since the dynamic has changed it’s healthy to be able to adapt to a new schedule. With divorce or separation, celebrating a holiday on a day other than the official calendar day may have to happen so you can accommodate your ex and the kids. You may be celebrating Thanksgiving the Saturday before or after the fourth Thursday in November. Know that it’s OK and being flexible alleviates the emotions and the stress.
You are starting over so why not make new holiday traditions. Celebrating the holidays in years past may not have been that great towards the end of your marriage. Now it’s time to make them great again with new family traditions. Life after divorce means new traditions and new beginnings with a glimpse of joy.
Focus on what’s good
Being in the moment and focusing on what you are doing to make the holidays fun means forget about your ex. Ignoring what your ex is doing for the holidays will keep you afloat and moving forward. Try and remember that it really doesn’t matter what your ex is doing so don’t compare. Concerning yourself with your ex yields misery and can keep you from focusing on what’s good in your life. If you dig deep, you’ll rise above and perhaps let the goodness take over.
The Law Offices of Rappleye and Rappleye P.C., have been providing comprehensive divorce and family law representation to clients in Jackson County and surrounding areas for over 60 years. Our practice covers a wide range of divorce and family law matters and is here to help. Call us today for a consultation!